Conversations with Dad.

I called my dad to remind him that he’s picking me up at the airport tomorrow morning. We had a good call and as usual the best part came at the end.  After I reminded him what time I was arriving and of all the other details he said, “Great.  See you tomorrow.  Beer floats.  That’s all I’m saying. If a Coke float is good, imagine a beer float.”  Then he hung up.  He never says goodbye, he’s one of those people who feel it’s bad luck.

The Good. The Bad. The Insults. Thanks Dad.

I’m having a G-sale before the move and my family is kindly donating their crap for my sale.  I love it!

My dad brought a bag of cloths for the sale, but also brought a special bag just for me. It was a bag of belts.

dad: I know how you like to wear belts and these don’t fit me anymore.  They’re too large. I think they’ll fit you.

me: Thanks dad.

Some of the belts were cool, but most were ridiculous.  Exactly what my dad would wear when venturing out as Lacy.

P7260072

P7260074

P7260073

What we learned today, sluts.

 

  • Kung Fo Panda is a philosophical action movie.  And, my favorite Buddha teaching from this moral adventure:

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. But today is a gift. 

Blame it on the booze, the pills, or my big bowl of fruity pebbles…but this was pretty touching. And then, we cut to the scene where that big British ninja cat escapes.  I was captivated.  My jaw dropped, fucking captivated for at least ten minutes.  Don’t even get me started on that creepy old turtle that can drop the big British ninja cat with a gentle touch on the chest.  What?

  • From Amber Frye (you tube) commentors we learned that some men call women cum dumpsters.  Sweet, isn’t it. We also learned from Amber, that she lies straight to our faces through the computer screen via a month old video on you tube. But, we love her, she’s an M to F trans-something slut, and the best one we know. Enjoy. 

Amber doesn’t allow people to embed her videos, because she’s a professional and shit. So, here’s the you tube link…click here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuHPsoprfCk 

 

And, because I’ve learned so much I would like to pass along some knowledge about ,myself. 

Growing up my dad was a clown…I’ve blogged about this before.  He performed at birthday parties, company picnics, and strip club grand openings. His performance included magic tricks.  Yes, my dad was a clown and a magician.  Well every magician/wizard/witch needs a magic word to activate the magic/spell. My dad’s, Hippy the Clown’s, was “peanut butter.”  Since a large portion of my dad’s gig were for Hispanic families, he felt obligated to relate to their culture and therefore tailored his magic word towards their customs.  When my dad clowned at a Hispanic family’s birthday party, his magic word was “frijoles.”

Now, I think I’ll clean my floors, have another bowl of cereal, a mountain dew and read my vampire novel, “Club Dead.”  I love that it’s still daylight!!!

Bea, I love you.

If, in 50 years, some young person ask me where I was the day Bea Arthur died I would say, at GayBingo with my cross dressing dad.  It was kind of fitting.  As the news came in through text messages, the Queens honored Bea and lifted our spirits with song and dance. 

I was looking for things to commemorate the moment and found a Golden Girl necklace from etsy.com. Sad news hookers, the necklace sold out. 

gg-necklace

Other GG paraphernalia include GG playing cards, GG lapel pins, and GG pendants. All at www.etsy.com.

Here’s a clip of our friend, doing a parody of Sex in the City.  She’s with other lovely ladies… Mona from Who’s The Boss, Sally Struthers and Mrs. Garrett.

Oh no she di’in.

I was going to blog about how I may see my dad in drag for the very first time.  It would happen in a few weeks and it will be the time and the place. 

Anyways, I was trying to find a pic that would be similar to what he would look like.  Instead, I found this spastic photo.

petticoat-swingset

BTW, below is what I envision when I picture my dad in drag, well, it’s close enough. In this example, I would say, to dad, “What are you doing on the floor?”

gabriel1-possible-dad