Ehhh.

I’m getting lonely and pale.

And I no longer think these underoos look ridiculous.  I think they look quite wonderful. Is this how women in the northeast spend their winters?  Lonely, pale and in granny panties?

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No Panty Lines for me, please

Gross.  Not pantie lines, but this new product.  At least it’s new to me.  Garment Guard is an alternative to panties.  You’re supposed to adhere (yuck adhesive and warmth) to the crotch of your britches.  Think of them as a crotch protector without the lines. Are you thinking, when would I find the perfect time to use these little protective pussy pasties (I know, so vulgarr, but I had to)…well you’re in luck the company answers your question.

  • The gym (don’t ruin those buns with panty lines!)
  • Low-rise pants (how do the undies escape?)
  • Bacteria avoidance (eww! washing doesn’t get it all).garment-guard
  • Why I don’t like these.  First, you throw them away, and I hope you only use them once.  So this makes them harmful to the polar bears and pandas.  Second, while the company claims they protect you from “rogue underwear peeking out the top of your low-riders” they don’t explain what to do if your garment guard slips off your britches’ crotch and falls through your pant leg and lands at someones feet. 

    Why I like them…They are heart shaped which does match the shape of my lady bits (and yours as well, I’m sure). and they are made in the USA, which so was I.  But, because I care about Polar Bears more than myself I will not consider purchasing this clever crotch covers.

    Still worried about pantie lines, here’s some other clever products.

    Good old fashion PANTY HOSE OR NYLONS (depending on your age)panty-hose

    The ever famous THONG

    thong

    and finally…this THING CALLED A C-STRING.  This is too much to even blog about.  Why would you put this thing on yourself.  Hey, as the tranny Amber says, don’t knock it till you try it. So, if you try it, please share.

    c-string