What a relief. It’s JD!

This is on Dlisted.

Yoohoo Johnny. It’s me. (then a wink)

And in this young man’s pocket would be the following map:


What we learned today, sluts.


  • Kung Fo Panda is a philosophical action movie.  And, my favorite Buddha teaching from this moral adventure:

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. But today is a gift. 

Blame it on the booze, the pills, or my big bowl of fruity pebbles…but this was pretty touching. And then, we cut to the scene where that big British ninja cat escapes.  I was captivated.  My jaw dropped, fucking captivated for at least ten minutes.  Don’t even get me started on that creepy old turtle that can drop the big British ninja cat with a gentle touch on the chest.  What?

  • From Amber Frye (you tube) commentors we learned that some men call women cum dumpsters.  Sweet, isn’t it. We also learned from Amber, that she lies straight to our faces through the computer screen via a month old video on you tube. But, we love her, she’s an M to F trans-something slut, and the best one we know. Enjoy. 

Amber doesn’t allow people to embed her videos, because she’s a professional and shit. So, here’s the you tube link…click here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuHPsoprfCk 


And, because I’ve learned so much I would like to pass along some knowledge about ,myself. 

Growing up my dad was a clown…I’ve blogged about this before.  He performed at birthday parties, company picnics, and strip club grand openings. His performance included magic tricks.  Yes, my dad was a clown and a magician.  Well every magician/wizard/witch needs a magic word to activate the magic/spell. My dad’s, Hippy the Clown’s, was “peanut butter.”  Since a large portion of my dad’s gig were for Hispanic families, he felt obligated to relate to their culture and therefore tailored his magic word towards their customs.  When my dad clowned at a Hispanic family’s birthday party, his magic word was “frijoles.”

Now, I think I’ll clean my floors, have another bowl of cereal, a mountain dew and read my vampire novel, “Club Dead.”  I love that it’s still daylight!!!

My fans…

I know you’ve missed me.  In your despair, I hope you haven’t committed suicide or slit your parents’ throats in the name of love.  I’ve been sick , don’t worry it wasn’t SARS or swine flu.  Lucky for me, I got a sexy voice out of the deal.  It’s peaking now, with no one around to swoon over it, but maybe it will hold over until tomorrow. I don’t know how to record my voice to share this sexy beast with you, so to tide you over, enjoy this video.  You may remember Amber from earlier post…she taught us how to give a clean blow job.  Does anyone think Amber is really David Lee Roth?  Love you!

Thank you. You’re welcome. Bend over. Fuck off.

I don’t know what it is about me, but I am irresistible to men of color and older white men. The Hispanic men love me, the Middle Eastern men love me, and the black  men love me.  Oh, I forgot hippies, they love me too. The older white dudes, like most white men, are hard to read.  Sometimes they stare, hard, from across the way.  Or they peek at me through a magazine or book.  I suppose, they’re being discreet.  Discretion is not at all what the other gentlemen practice. They are blatant and abruptly to their point. Which, in the end,  their point is a compliment, I think.  And, like the lady I am I accept graciously.

Today, such an abrupt moment happened.  I was waiting to board the bus when an older (50-60) black man approached me.  He said, “Thank you.”  Remember I have my ear buds in, so I removed them and replied, “What’s that?”  He repeated, “Thank you.”  I said, “For what?”  My suitor says, “For showing that figure off.”  The only thing to say was, “Thank you.”  Then he started in, it’s like they can’t contain their words.  He told me I was the kind of woman that makes a man cheat.  Again, your welcome and onto the bus I went.

This got me thinking about the other lines I’ve heard in the past. And I know this sort of thing happens to others. You know who you are, my fellow hookers.  Ms. K is a prime example.  We’ve been together and heard some things from dudes that is fucking ridiculous. I guess they think they’re complimenting us, or telling us about their “powers”, I don’t know. Maybe we have friendly faces or maybe its are boobies.  No, it’s our friendly faces.

It’s been explained to me that men who are into me, are men who have had many women. You see, because they have so much experience they know what they want in a women, physically and sexually, that is.  Again, I think these are compliments. At lease that’s how I’m going to take them. I  have a feeling that when they think them in their head, they just don’t realize what it will sound like when it comes out. Or maybe these lines have worked on chicks before.

It all goes back to “getting in my pants” something my dad warned me about when I was ten.  (I had all my “coming of age” talks early because I’m the youngest.  My sister is three years older than I, and my parents were really overworked and tired.  So killing two birds with one stone, or ruining two adolescents with one talk was preferred.)

not a hero, but she has my shirt onOkay, so maybe I dress like a slut.  Or have a face like a slut.  I’ve been told on three occasions, by three different men, well one teenager and two men, that I have “dick sucking lips.”  Okay, now that I’m writing this, I must look like a slut for guys to talk to me like that.  Maybe it’s the pumps, maybe it’s the tight skirts or the red lips.  Or maybe it’s the shirt that reads “I’m a slut and open for business.”  In any case, I’m in good company and I’d rather be a slut than a bore.






So, I’ll continue to put some bass in my walk.  Some of my heroes and fellow sluts…













In case you didn't know, this is Koko- the sign language gorilla- with Mr. Rogers. Both are my heroes.